Dear Mr. Sparks, 

It has come to my attention that your novel, Dear John, has recently opened in theaters as a movie. Based on a fictional account from the point of view of a soldier, Dear John shows how one man faces the challenges of a new relationship while continuing to serve his country.

While I have not seen your new movie, based on what I know from reading the book and seeing the movie's trailer, I feel it my duty as a real-life military girlfriend to talk to you about how you portray the relationship between Savannah, a college girl, who falls for John, the title character. 

Mr. Sparks, your novel and subsequent film are very over-romanticized about the lifestyle myself and other military girlfriends and wives live every day. It's a shame this inaccurate portrayal leads Savannah's character to lack development and seem weak, depending on John's affection and attention to keep her happy rather than developing into a strong, independent young woman who conquers the difficulties of distance through self-discovery. While I haven't faced a deployment with my boyfriend yet, we have been long distance the majority of our relationship. My friends and I can tell you first hand, It is anything but happy times all of the time to live apart. 

The dramatic music and lovey-dovey sentiments exchanged from your movie's trailer, which focuses mostly on John's leave time rather than when he's away, only slightly cover what it can be like to have that time together. Leave is fun, but it's only a break from the reality of this military lifestyle. Leave is also very short - 2 weeks to a month typically - so much of the time together is nothing like the time apart. The reality is, many military wives and girlfriends experience frustration, communication problems and feelings of loneliness when their man is away. This life is anything but easy and many relationships falter or can fall apart because it is so difficult. 

While I applaud your use of subject matter very few authors touch on, I think it would have been more accurate if your novel (and, subsequently, your movie) included research from the lives of the women who encounter this type of relationship on a daily basis rather than living vicariously through a novel or movie. Clearly, this dramatization, a work from your mind, does not have any influence from the real-life reality of the military community from a woman's perspective. It's a disservice to the military community and to all the men and women who see your film to inaccurately portray this life just as other authors have done when writing romance-type novels. 

One consequence you and others fail to see from writing this type of novel, is the emergence o fThe Crazy Woman who, in believing the hype of the dramatized lifestyle of a military girlfriend, begins to develop into what many of us call a "dog tag chaser." These women constantly contend with each other in search of a soldier's affection, leading to unfortunate circumstances for all involved, such as heartbreak, quicky marriages and misunderstandings of one another's real intentions of the relationship.

Mr. Sparks, I strongly urge you to consider the real-life situation the next time you develop a storyline like this. It might not bring in the cash that The Notebook or this book/movie have, but its more true-to-life depiction will receive more praise and more of a following from the audience you attempt to portray.

Best, 
Megan