Crossroads 11/04/2009
 
I'm at a crossroads and unsure of which path to take.

Everything with Steve has been going great. We're really anticipating his leave and talking more, finding more ways to do things together apart (such as work outs and reading book series together).  I can't believe we've nearly been together a whole year! 

This tour of duty is nearly over but sometimes it feels like it began yesterday. The feelings never really go away; I still can get agitated or hurt when someone pushes my buttons the wrong way (such as trying to get sympathy for not seeing a significant other for only one day) and I still am really defensive about my relationship (you'd think I'd be used to hearing the comment, "It must be so hard to be with someone who isn't there. I never could" by now, but it's honestly never something I'm able to get used to hearing). I can still cry at the drop of a hat if I hear a particular song, see a sappy love scene, etc. But the foundation we've built is really solid, and I'm so excited to go on real dates again and stuff. It's so soon!

Academically, however, I'm unsure. It's come to my attention recently that a year from this December, I could be done with undergrad. What I will do with that time off between undergrad and law school isn't set in stone just yet. Do I travel? Work? Do a little of both? Start law school early?

It's really exciting to be done sooner than I thought. But what to do with that time? I know only I can decide what to do and what is right for me, but right now, I just want to enjoy life. I really do think I'll take some of that time and travel, and I'll work, but for now I'd really like to have "me" time more and do things I enjoy. 

School and organizations are fun, and I like to be involved, but I stress so much because I don't have that time to myself to think, reflect, unwind, de-stress, etc. Oh sure, next semester the smaller workload will be good, but I'm replacing a 3 credit class I could be taking with LSAT studying. So I'll have "me" time but also be working on what could be studying for the most important test of my life so far.
I know it will all fall into place. It's exciting and scary to grow up, but I'm liking the journey so far!
 


Comments

Samantha

Wed, 04 Nov 2009 7:17:39 pm

I'm glad things are looking up. And he'll be done with the deployment very soon! Growing up is definitely exciting and scary, and I still have my "mom" moments - I'm ok with that too. :)

 



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