Dear Mr. Sparks, 

It has come to my attention that your novel, Dear John, has recently opened in theaters as a movie. Based on a fictional account from the point of view of a soldier, Dear John shows how one man faces the challenges of a new relationship while continuing to serve his country.

While I have not seen your new movie, based on what I know from reading the book and seeing the movie's trailer, I feel it my duty as a real-life military girlfriend to talk to you about how you portray the relationship between Savannah, a college girl, who falls for John, the title character. 

Mr. Sparks, your novel and subsequent film are very over-romanticized about the lifestyle myself and other military girlfriends and wives live every day. It's a shame this inaccurate portrayal leads Savannah's character to lack development and seem weak, depending on John's affection and attention to keep her happy rather than developing into a strong, independent young woman who conquers the difficulties of distance through self-discovery. While I haven't faced a deployment with my boyfriend yet, we have been long distance the majority of our relationship. My friends and I can tell you first hand, It is anything but happy times all of the time to live apart. 

The dramatic music and lovey-dovey sentiments exchanged from your movie's trailer, which focuses mostly on John's leave time rather than when he's away, only slightly cover what it can be like to have that time together. Leave is fun, but it's only a break from the reality of this military lifestyle. Leave is also very short - 2 weeks to a month typically - so much of the time together is nothing like the time apart. The reality is, many military wives and girlfriends experience frustration, communication problems and feelings of loneliness when their man is away. This life is anything but easy and many relationships falter or can fall apart because it is so difficult. 
 
 
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It is my pleasure to receive this Bloggy Award from Wife of a Sailor, one of my many mil friends on Twitter! It's the first award I've ever gotten on my site and I'm very excited about it!

Before I express who I've nominated, I'd like to say a few updates, since it's been a while since I've been here!

1) I began my new job at a law firm last Monday, and it's been...well, not easy. It's my first new job in 2 years and is so far the only job I really have cared about because how I do here can determine basically the rest of my life (if and where I attend law school, if I'll be working there later, etc.), so it's been challenging but I've enjoyed it.


2) Some of the craziness from my last post has died down, and I think things will be good for us this year. We have a lot of growing up to do and big decisions have yet to be made about  A LOT in our lives, but I think this year will be a good one. :) 


3) I got a new fishy! His name is Pauly and he's a betta. He's pretty neat. You might think it's kind of lame for me to brag about owning a fish, but most of the pets I had as a kid I didn't take care of; my mother was the pet caregiver. So having him is going to be fun! I have his fish bowl set up just perfectly and will transport him back into it tonight (his water needs to regulate to room temp. again, since I came back to my apartment at school.


And now, for my award:

 
 
What a week it has been. Between the shootings at Fort Hood and Orlando, it has been a struggle to keep focus on the fact that there is violence every day that goes unreported or unnoticed. My thoughts and prayers are with the families at Fort Hood and Orlando who are suffering after these senseless acts took place.

In the mil community, there was a lot of talk about the "hows" and "whys" of what happened at Fort Hood. Speculation and rumor ruled the day Thursday as no one knew how many or who was injured or dead, or why the shooting took place. Currently, the shooter is in a coma, so many questions are still unanswered. I spoke with friends who are part of this community and one overarching theme arose: We all feel very deeply about what went on, and we must realize that we should be thankful for what we have. 

I actually got really angry at one point reading in some Facebook groups and chats that said some people were "so glad their soldier wasn't at that base" or "thank goodness his orders were changed and he wasn't there that day." They talked about how God had spared them the pain and how fortunate they were, and while I'm among those that did not have a loved one on the base, I still became irritated with this language. People died or were injured senselessly, and all you can do is be selfish and thank your lucky stars you and yours were spared?! 

While I understand this feeling can be unavoidable - being grateful you know your loved one is okay - the least these people could do is express their prayers for that family and leave the selfishness unsaid. But like a friend of mine has reminded me this week, it takes all kinds to make this world go 'round.

Continuous prayers go out to the families at Fort Hood and in Orlando through this difficult time. May your service members' and your own sacrifices never been taken for granted in defending our freedoms.
 
 
I recently saw on this Facebook group I'm part of (though I don't participate much in it...long story) that Nicholas Sparks' book, "Dear John," is being adapted to film. Actor Channing Tatum plays the role of title character John Tyree, a young man in the Army who meets Savannah Lynn Curtis, played by Amanda Seyfried in the movie, while he's on R&R. 

After seeing all these mil gfs/fiancees get worked up about the movie (mostly ooh-ing and ahh-ing about Channing Tatum), I found the trailer online. Click here to check it out if you're interested. 

I read the book and must say I'm a skeptic about the movie. For one thing, I didn't think the book was written that well. The book ending was NOT what I expected. The book actually made me angry about how Sparks portrayed Savannah. She was not a very strong character, and while Sparks seems keen on description, Savannah comes off as a kind but naive girl. It's hard to say in reading it if I could really find myself liking her. Perhaps that was his intent, but as far as a love story goes, it didn't sell well with me.

Also, the trailer wasn't that spectacular. It makes some attempt at capturing most key scenes from the book, but isn't particularly exciting to watch. Like the book, it's a lot of talking at a slow pace, capturing a few romantic scenes. If I hadn't already read the book, I still don't think the trailer would have been a big sell for me.

I realize "Dear John" is a work of fiction; the author only has so much space to portray a story, and usually in a first person narrative one can only choose to explain one perspective. I was disappointed in how it was written, though. I don't think it was one of his stronger stories (like A Walk to Remember or The Notebook), but perhaps the movie version will improve upon the foundation the book provides.

"Dear John" comes to theaters Feb. 5, 2010.