Bed time last night: 12:40 a.m.
Approx. time fell asleep: 1:15 a.m.
Time woke up: 9 a.m, but I fell asleep again until 10:30 because I had a day off
Currently feeling: Pretty good!

I would have gone to bed earlier but, as stated before, I had to work until midnight. Thus, the 11:30 p.m. bed time was just NOT happening. But what was nice about last night was I was so tired from working two jobs yesterday that I fell asleep faster! :) 

In my last post about the sleep experiment, I expressed that I was stressed and overwhelmed about the fall. Many of you suggested I hold off on applying for grad school, and I think for now it will be on the back burner. I have more calls to make and information to find out, but right now I need to just focus on wedding planning, getting through classes and work, and moving to be with Steve at the start of next year. I have enough going on that I don't need to add the app process and GRE to the mix!

Anyway, that's really all for now. I'm trying to be more upbeat about things despite feeling pretty much alone in the wedding planning (Steve is great, but it would be nice to have more help from people at home, like my mom or sister) and having family treat me like dirt. Such is life, I guess.
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More 08/18/2010
 
I know, a rare posting of two blog posts in a day! But I had a lot on my mind and I felt it was right to say it.

I have tried very hard not to complain very much on here. I know a lot of people have it worse off than me, and I want this to come off as nicely as I can. However, there's just something I need to say.

I am more.
 
 
Bed time last night: 12:00 a.m. (I know, I failed to get to bed early)
Approx. time fell asleep: 12:30-1a.m.
Time woke up: 9 a.m.
Currently feeling: Tired, overwhelmed

I tried really hard to fall asleep. REALLY HARD. I listened to Sigur Rós (one of my favorite bands) on my iPod and tried to meditate again. It didn't really work, so I turned off my iPod and just laid there. Once again, my thoughts kept me up.

Now that morning has come, I am overwhelmed with today's schedule and what it means for this experiment. Today, I work at one job from noon to 5, and the other from 7 to midnight. That means getting home close to 12:30 with the drive. Now, this isn't so bad tonight because I can sleep in tomorrow. But what about my regular schedule? Next week, I work 9-5 at one job Thursdays. Ugh!

I'm beginning to wonder if working so much is such a good idea, especially with school and wedding planning. My mom decided this week that she wants me to have more control over my wedding, so she's relinquished a lot of things to me. This wouldn't be so bad except this fall, I...

-am trying to apply for grad school
-am working 35 hours a week
-have 12 credits worth of classes to finish up
-wanted to try to squeeze in a social life into the mix

Am I doing too much? Probably. But I don't know what else I can do right now. I can't stop working because I need to pay for things for the wedding. I can't quit school; it's my last semester. I need to apply for this grad school program I want to do because applying while 1,000 miles from home would be very, very hard in the spring. Sigh. 

So yeah, I don't know if this experiment is really worth it. I want to still try to retool my sleep habits. It's just going to take longer than I thought initially.
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Bed time last night: 11:30 p.m.
Approx. time fell asleep: 12:15-12:20 a.m.
Time woke up: Once around 8 a.m., and later at 9 a.m. when my alarm went off
Currently feeling: Somewhat tired, but pretty good

In my last post I mentioned that I am going to try to change my sleeping habits so that when school starts next week, I will be prepared to be in class or work at 9 a.m., awake and energized. This might take some getting used to, but I think if I can get my body into the habit of going to bed earlier, I will be better for it. 

Last night was difficult. I tried to meditate, but my thoughts would NOT be quiet. I couldn't silence my brain! I think exhaustion finally helped me go to sleep. I just could not get comfortable; my pillows felt too flat, or I was unsure which way to lay so I would fall asleep.

I think tonight I will try for the same bed time of 11:30. I don't work until noon tomorrow, but it would still be good to form that habit of waking early. We will see how tonight goes!
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It's hard to believe that in just a week, I'll begin my final semester of undergrad. It's amazing how fast college went by! I feel as though I just arrived at my university yesterday, a timid freshman with a thousand different paths to take in life, and yet at the end of the year, I'll be leaving for good and taking off into an adventure of a whole other magnitude - married life, graduate school, and living 1,000 miles from home. Unbelievable! 

This semester will probably be the hardest yet. Three of my classes will be 400 level, and the last one just 100 level. The 100 level class will probably easy peasy stuff compared to the other classes, two of which are Spanish classes. Additionally, I am working two jobs. Yep, I am pretty much going to have no free time this semester. I'll be working over 30 hours a week on top of classes! Thankfully one job is a work study, so I can just do homework (in theory) while doing that job.

My biggest concern at the moment, however, involves insomnia.
 
 
It's time foranother exciting edition of Sunday Stories! We have The Annoyed Army Wife to thank for this fun idea!

The first installment of this story can be found here, but it's not necessary to read it to understand the second part. I plan to complete my story today about how Steve and I met and began to date!

Sidenote: It's very long, but I think you will enjoy this part of the story!
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I am SEVERELY behind! We began our vacation to Canada about 3 weeks ago, and I only just now am able to catch up on MilSpouse Friday Fill-Ins for the past three weeks. Big apologies!

If you haven't participated in MilSpouse Friday Fill-In before, head on over to Wife of a Sailor's website for more information!
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Week #6
1. What is your spouse's best feature?
I love Steve's eyes and his smile. He just has a way of making me see the brighter side of things and laughing even when I don't feel like it. There's just something about his green, color-changing eyes and mischievous smile. They get me every time!

2. Mild, Medium or Hot Sauce?
I can handle mild and medium sauce. But not hot! I'd like to feel my tongue the next day.

3. What is the wost uniform you had to wear for a job?
I guess it's not bad in comparison to some other people's jobs, but when I worked at a Christian bookstore - my first job! - they changed the outfits early on from whatever shirt you wanted to wear with black pants to wearing a white shirt, black pants and these STUPID purple aprons! I swear, I felt like a penguin walking around that store having to help people in this embarrassing outfit! Not to mention any time you had to get things out of the back room and they had styrofoam it would stick to your pants, making them ashy instead of black. Ugh. It was so hideous!

4. You have invisible powers...where is the first place you would go? 
Hm...that's tough. I guess I would want to spy on Steve, haha. But I would have to fly to see him and then spy on him, so that's kind of complicated. As far as in my local area, I would spy on my sister a little bit and see what it's like in her world.

5. What's left on your "to do" list for the summer?
Oh gosh, summer is barely even here anymore! How sad! 

But now that you mention it, I have to...
-Do more wedding planning
-Get new tires mounted on my car
-Get the car's oil changed
-Figure out school financial aid
-Have a "me" day...maybe this Saturday? :)
-Get my driver's license renewed

Week #7
1. What is something you wish you learned to do earlier in life?
I wish I had learned that it is totally possible to become someone you hate and that it's a long, long road before you can completely change that aspect of yourself you don't like. Basically, I wish I had been smarter when I was younger (like, 2-3 years ago) and actually listened to people. It would have saved me a lot of problems down the road!

2. What is your biggest pet peeve with the military?
I don't like that Steve's schedule changes from week to week, and sometimes from hour to hour. His company likes to hold them over in formation for FOREVER sometimes, so I have a feeling when we're married that'll be a pet peeve of mine because I just know I'll have dinner ready and have to wait even longer for him thanks to the military!

3. What tourist attraction near you have you never seen?
I have never been to Cahokia Mounds, but I would really like to go! It's probably a 30-45 minute drive from where I'm living.

4. What are you avoiding doing right now?
Going to bed (it's almost midnight Thursday here)...and looking through books for school. I want to overachieve a bit and take a peek at the materials, but something inside me is still saying, "We must RESIST! It's still summer!"

5. Wine, beer, or liquor?
I'm beginning to like wine more now that I know a little better what I like, but if I couldn't have wine I'd like vodka and cranberry. Actually, anything with vodka except orange juice.

Week #8
1. What is ONE thing you'd like civilians to understand about being a military family?
I would like civilians to understand what it's like to walk a day in my shoes. It's not an easy life!

I would also like them to understand that regardless of how you feel about the politics of war, our troops need all of the love and support we can give them while they are deployed. 

2. What is your favorite mistake?
Hmm, I'm not sure I understand this question. I guess flying down to see this guy a few years ago and meeting his family, only to have him not have the same feelings I did. It was fun visiting his city, as I had never been to it, and getting to know his family was fun at the time, too!

3. What indulgence could you give up for a year?
I could give up chocolate. MAYBE. It would be hard!

4. If you could be a winged animal, what would you be?
A phoenix! I don't care if they're not real!

5. What is one question you'd like to see asked in a future MFF?
Perhaps something along the lines of, "What song describes your life right now?" or "If you made a 3 song soundtrack of your life, which 3 songs would you choose?" Something creative relating to music would be interesting to answer! Plus, I love reading other's answers to the questions!
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I'm back! Well, I have been for a few days, but never really wanted to write anything.

Our trip to Canada was good! It was great attending my cousin's wedding, as it made me all the more excited for my big day in the winter! It was wonderful seeing family all together at the wedding. And the dancing that went on, hoo boy! Even my great grandmother, who will be 93 next month, was dancing up a storm! It was very memorable.

But as with every vacation, it must end, and end it did Monday, when we finally arrived home. But I came home with gifts! My family got me some wedding presents that I could bring home with me - and I have a KitchenAid on the way! Woo hoo! I am so excited to have a KitchenAid of my own! :) It's the little things that get me excited, haha.
 
 
Well, for now, this is goodbye! I promise I will be back soon with more updates! I am going on a trip with family! 

We will be driving to Canada to visit all of our family as well as go to my cousin's wedding! I haven't been back since Spring Break, and some people in my family haven't been back longer than that, but it should be really fun! I have a really close friend from all the way back in fourth grade I get to visit with, too, which will be great! We haven't had a chance to catch up in a VERY long time!

Right now I am mostly packed, and tomorrow I have more to do before I go to work and then drive up to be with everyone before we begin to drive later in the week. Yep, we are driving to Canada! Hah, it should be fun. 

I will have my laptop, but I'm 95% sure I won't be online much at all, especially for updates. We will be in a rural area anyway, so something like a "wi fi hotspot" would be truly foreign to the locals. If you want some idea of how very rural we are talking, let's just say only a few of my relatives even have email, much less Internet connections! But it should be fun and a nice retreat from the usual. I heard the temps will be cooler, too. Yay!

If you follow me on Twitter, you will notice I have gone private, and that's only to save myself the trouble later on of deleting a million spambots that invade my account. I'm sure you all understand. :) If you are wanting to follow me, sorry! I will have to approve you when I return.

So, this is goodbye for now. But I shall be back soon!

From your "world traveling" friend (hah!),
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Monday has nearly come and gone, and I have a lot on my mind at this late hour. It wasn't the busiest of days, but it wasn't too terribly difficult either. 

Today wasn't overly exciting, nor was it boring. It was pretty average for a typical summer work day. Later on, though, after I had clocked out and was having dinner, the What If's creeped back into my life.

You know all about What If's, right? They can take on any form. I like to think of them as shape shifting pieces of doubt that hang suspended in the air just outside of our thoughts, waiting to appear the second those two words enter our mind. The What If's came around today in a form I hadn't seen before; they formed the question, "What if we were legally married already?"